Trump Announces the Winners of the Fake News Awards

By Jack T.

Oscar season is boring. The movies can be quite good, but the awards show is the worst. It’s just a party for elitist, sex-harassing celebrities. The only award show that I want to see is President Trump’s first annual Fake News Awards. And after watching it, believe me, it was the best award show ever.

In a nice tongue-in-cheek list, President Trump tallied the ten fakest new stories of 2017. I won’t go through all ten (you can read them all here), but I will highlight the three fakest of the fake news award winners.

Coming in at number three, we have the Martin Luther King Jr. bust. When Barack Obama was President, he moved the White House’s MLK bust into the Oval Office. TIME falsely reported that Trump had taken the bust out in one of his first days in office. Trump must be a racist, right!? No, turns out Trump kept the MLK bust in the Oval Office.

At number two, we have ABC’s Brian Ross. Ross infamously reported that Donald Trump ordered Michael Flynn to contact the Russians before the election. This story was of course completely false. Trump ordered Flynn to do this after the election when it was Flynn’s job to do so. Additionally, the Dow took a 350 point nose dive after Ross’s incorrect report. Fake news has real consequences.

Finally, at number one, we have the fakest of fake news stories… Russian collusion. A year has passed since the first cries of “Russian collusion” from CNN and the DNC, and there is… no collusion. This is the greatest political witch hunt of all time. The more the Democrats dig, the sillier they look coming up empty handed.

It’s only a matter of time before the Russia hysteria goes away. The newest narrative that Trump is mentally incompetent or showing symptoms of dementia is likewise losing credibility. The Obama appointed White House Doctor recently gave Trump an excellent health rating and a perfect score on the competency test.

You’re probably thinking, so what’s CNN’s Trump hysteria narrative? The new narrative is that he’s overweight. The horror: fat shaming from feminists. How will Trump survive this one?

As we start a new year, be on the lookout for more fake news. Trump has shown everyone how bad it was in 2017. It may be worse in 2018. Either way, Trump has two ways to win and no ways to lose. Trump’s agenda will keep rolling out, the media will still publish fake news, and the public will learn to love Trump and hate the media even more. The media is going to have to work hard if they want to win more awards at next year’s second annual Fake News Awards. Good luck to them… but I don’t think they’ll need it.