Happy Indigenous Peoples’ Day!

Today we celebrate the superiority of the indigenous people who made this country what it is. Without their many achievements, such as inventing fire and figuring out a use for the buffalo’s butthole, the European colonists would certainly have been lost.

The Native peoples of America had a progressive, forward-thinking approach to property rights as well as sensible environmental policy. Their idea was simple but effective, genocide the weaker tribes and make more earth-friendly use of the lands they inhabited.

Their approaches to child labor were millennia beyond the what the primitive Europeans imported and their informal approach to legal proceedings put common law court systems to shame. They solved the debate over intellectual property by not having a written language. Oh how we could learn from them.

Their medical systems were so advanced that they had eradicated all transmittable diseases from the continent which is what left them so vulnerable to the smallpox blanket toting Europeans. Western medical science today is completely devoid of the many dances and herbal mixtures which were commonly practiced treatments in the Americas.

On this very special Indigenous Peoples’ Day, remember to thank all of the Native Peoples who helped lay the groundwork for producing the modern educational, legal, and scientific systems that make our lives today possible.

Vincent Cucchiara


  1. Although this may be satire, the earliest known burial grounds found in North America are dated to be almost 25,000 years old, with DNA evidence and evidence of burial ceremonies positively identifying them as white Europeans. This predates anything found belonging to the American Indians who came from Asia. This along with hoplite-style weaponry found within close proximity to the burial grounds proves that whites were the first human settlers of the Americas, and were murdered by the ancestrally-Asian American Indians who came much later. Of course genocide against whites, regardless of the time period, is acceptable genocide, as long as it benefits any of the other 700 BC arched-forehead tribal races existing today on this planet.

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